The Heart Break Series

18:46 nm 0 Comments

4 am on Saturday, I walked in through door to my apartment and was greeted by a terribly sad roommate. My chill girl vibes kicked in. Before a word is spoken there was a pot of peppermint tea brewing and Bing Crosby playing on the turntable. 

The topic was clear, we were going to dissect (for the trillionth time) the beings that spin us ladies into a tizzy of smeared mascara or blushing grins; Lovers. We have many ways address them in our home; The Babely One, Whats Their Face, The Asshole, The One With The Hair, and my personal favourite, Big Stupid Idiot. 

The Big Stupid Idiot in question had made quite the impression on my friend. During these moments, the only thing I can do is have open ears, and agree with every statement that haphazardly comes flying out of her mouth. After the storm of bitching and cursing our sexualities, we started to think how she can avoid future situations. One option we came up with was to take a break from going out in Vancouver, or in my roomies words “become a Grandma”. Another was to take on the persona of stone cold Medusa and expertly curse every prospect that dares to stare into her vengeful eyes. 

With little sleep, emotions were running high most of our ridiculous strategies started to make sense. I believed that if I needed to avoid heartbreak again I should refrain from  shaving my legs and start putting energy into having my cats Instagram account reach the popular page. Luckily, the next morning I came to. I realized that there is nothing that she should or should not do. Its unfortunate, but heartbreaks are unavoidable. Someone out there is bound to seek out your heart and fumble with it. I am thankful for this, as sadistic as it might seem. If The One With The Hair hadn’t taken an icepick to my heart I would have never clued in that my relationship with this person was going absolutely no wHAIR and I would not have experienced the sting of rejection. 

Learning about rejection helped me have better understanding about the fucked cycle of dating. I know that the next person I fall for quite possibly wont be The One. That may be a pessimistic statement, but I have to be real with myself. Knowing this will help me deal with the next potential heartbreak, it will probably cut the sob time in half and save me some calories on an emotion filled chocolate binge.There has to be a moment where one should stop, and look for enlightenment. There is a lesson in each person you meet, wether it be realizing that your self respect might need some work, or that next time second chances should be carefully considered. 

This will not be the last time I will console a friend early in the morning, nor will it be the last time we drink 2 bottles of wine and curse love. I find comfort in believing that everything has a purpose. If it takes hairy legs and a few heart scaring lovers to find that purpose; “challenge accepted” said the razor.

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Granville Island, Tea & Chats

16:17 nm 0 Comments



I love to start my mornings thinking of an outfit that matches my mood or can uplift my mood if I happen to wake up on the wrong side of the bed. Today I met with a bosom pal of mine. We had planned to go walking in Jericho, when the rain kicked in, as it always does in Vancouver, our plan changed to Granville Island. I had the perfect chill out ensemble for a tea and muffins and to explore the floral forests of the market.














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She's Back

23:26 nm 0 Comments


I have been a bad blogger. It's been 23 days since I landed on the land of beavers and maple syrup, and I haven't posted anything about my amazing trip. I will chalk up my lack of blog posts to laziness. There. I admit that I've been a lazy, lazy lady. I'm back with new ideas, and stories of my adventure.


Coming back from a trip is a lot harder then I thought it would be. I should've known. I try and get away from the Canadian winter every year. I always think that when I come home my life will resume as it was before. It's never been that way. The first week is always the hardest, this time it was especially hard. It's strange how I am forced to recognize how much I changed in just over a month. I try and fit what I made my life to be for 6 weeks to match what I used to know before. Which is impossible, because I am a completely different person now. In San Pedro I was accustomed to waking up early, playing the funkiest beats on my iPod and running up the coast a few miles. I'd eat breakfast with Sponge Bob Square Pants in my yellow beachfront apartment, then I'd make my way to the dive shop where I would live out my passion. When I got to Vancouver, my focus was changed to bus routes, catching up with friends, starting work at The Commodore Ballroom and watching my tan fade away. I felt this sudden rush and pressure of needing to prove to myself that I could be a successful citizen in Vancouver again. Not just a curly haired beach bum, eating coconuts while humming reggae tunes.

Yesterday was the first time I realized that I needed to slow my roll, and just appreciate the amazing adventure I created for myself. This grounding moment deserves some recognition. My new life long friend from Belize, Tianna, is visiting the city. We went for coffee to catch up. I was telling her all these elaborate plans I had to concur the world. With her beautiful bronzed glow she asked to me "What about being a dive master?".  My jaw dropped, I realized that I had forgotten that I made a goal for myself and promptly executed it in 6 weeks. In Belize I was training to become a Rescue Diver. I now know how to help save a life in water and on land, how to search and recover, how to bandage wounds, help nervous or shocked divers, and how to be a beautiful mermaid (yes, that is a Rescue Diver qualification). My final goal is to be a Dive Master or an Instructor. I had such a special bond with each of my Dive Masters at Chuck and Robbie's. I have respect for each of them, they taught me patience, to constantly seek adventure and to check my regulator before every dive for plastic toy cockroaches. They are incredibly inspiring people, one day I'd like to be that Dive Master for someone.

Leaving Belize was hard, but leaving the ocean was way, way more difficult. I went into my last dive taking in every single moment of it: The pre dive briefing, clipping my gear in perfectly, taking my last roll in, sitting on the bottom looking for shells, playing with nurse sharks, and exploring every inch of Natty's Reef with every breath of compressed air that I could. After the dive, everyone was getting ready to leave. I couldn't help myself but to jump off the the side of the boat, just to feel it one more time. Once I was back on the boat, I started crying. I really wanted to stop, because my muffled sobs and puffy eyes were making the amazing dive hella awkward for the other divers, but I couldn't. It felt like a breakup. I was lucky to have the guys there, giving me hugs and telling me that I would be back soon. Although that was hard, I am elated that I have found something that I am truely passionate about. I found my place.

Now that I've had sometime to think, unwind and refocus, my plans are still the same. One day I'll be a Dive Master or Instructor, but I have some other idea's brewing in my head in the mean time. The Belizian lifestyle has taught me to live expressively and full of love, to always smile to strangers, and to walk confidently.

San Pedro, I'll be back. Keep those dolphins happy, eat lots of home baked cookies and drink a few Belikin's for me. 


    
    Beers and Marie Sharps hot sauce.


     Meet Zibby: Queen of Boca Del Rio 
    A bad day to be a grouper


    The shortie tan


My buddy Kyle. He and I would chill out on my front porch, play volley ball, look for hermit crabs, and throw coconuts at docks. He is also the first person I've met who shares the same birthday as me!
   The things I would do for a Johnny Cake right now....


While on a boat ride to Caye Caulker, we met up with some dolphins doin' their thaaang.

Palapa Bar bliss with Max, Tianna, and Erik 

The dive crew at Chuck and Robbie's



Juan taught me everything I know about saving lives! 



   To end- my infamous sea salt hair. 



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Land Days

07:13 nm 0 Comments

Due to weather, my mermaid training has taken a 2 day break. The first day, the winds on the island were so strong, I felt like Dorthy. As I was trying not to get blown away from my Oz, I knew it would be a no go for diving. The water was so murky,  making the "viz" no bueno. That day I sat on the beach, trying to fix my wet suit tan. There is only so much tanning you can do when the wicked wind is blowing sand all over you. From there on my days off turned into a Tour De San Pedro. Tianna, Chefy and I decided to rent bikes and go to the south end of the island. I always forget how much I love biking.  My childhood is built around spontaneous bike rides with my best friend in Sarnia. We thought we were so bad ass ripping around our favourite park as fast as we could avoiding he underwear man who apparently lived there. 

Anyways, It was a really fantastic, relaxing, skin sizzling day. I haven't been to the south end since I was here 5 years ago. It was cool to see how it changed. That afternoon we found a dock to chill on, we tanned and chatted about everything. There are no complaints from this girl about my land days. I even got to see a trantula. I'd never ever, ever, thought I'd see one in real life roaming around in the wild.

My legs are sore, I've mastered the "LOOK MOM NO HANDS" and my tanlines are getting more embarrassing. A successful few days in my opinion.


  








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Carnival

17:54 nm 0 Comments


I'm so stoked to say that the theory part of my Rescue Diver training is over. I have already celebrated with a couple Belikin beers, and I intend to end the evening that way as well. I want to give all my student friends a big BRAVA for all their hard work, I forgot how much dedication and focus it takes when you're trying to get an education, but all hard work needs a break right? I took a break about a week and a half ago to celebrate San Pedro's annual Carnival.

This carnival has no questionable rides, deep fried doughnuts or creepy carnies. Carnival has a simple objective and you only need 4 tools to have a good time.

1) Baby Oil
2) Rum
3) Latex Paint 
4) Eggs

If you think this event is really a sex crazed- omelet- paint party, you are wrong my friend. This Carnival takes simple tools, mixes them with good music and people. BOOM- There you have it, too much fun and reminders of it for weeks as you pull paint out of your hair.

I first noticed the town preparing for the event days before, plastic tarps were being taped to business fronts, statues and fences. Local hard ware stores were having paint specials and kids were selling their own paint on the street, like lemonade stands. Carnival is broken into 3 days, the first day is for the little itty kiddies to play without getting hurt, the second day is for sassy teenagers to throw paint at their crushes, a colour courtship. The last day is for adults to act like sassy teenagers, the evening is usually fuelled by rum and the childish antcitipation to throw paint at anything.

The first step in Carnival prep is to well oil your hair and skin it makes it easier for the paint to come off, you also should wear clothes you don't care about. A trick my new Belizian friends taught me is to have some paint on you before you enter the war zone, or else you are seen as "fresh meat". It's also advised you paint your own tata's and cakes, so people don't have a reason to cop a feel.

I spent a lot of the evening throwing paint at strangers like I was in a reggae Ke$ha video, there was even glitter, just to seal the deal. During the craziness, I took a moment to play with the kids in the park. They would run up to me with their hands out asking for paint. After I gave them some, they would stare at it like they had no idea what to do with it, I suggested that they paint me. I was covered in my own paint for a while, it look like I took the route of a teal green suicide. 

Now I know it's probably frowned upon, but when you're covered in latex paint, the ocean looks like a good idea. I had a couple swims, one memorable swim against my will, a friend carried me in and tossed me into the salty bath. As I sat there in detest, a very friendly lady started scrubbing me down with sand, telling me "mah gal, it's the only way to get it aff". That one of the strangest baths to date. The only problem with rinsing off, is you immediately become fresh meat again.

This evening was one of the bests nights out I've ever had, and when you walk through San Pedro you see reminders of Carnival hand prints on palm trees. Hopefully I'll be back here next year, ready for a paint party and rum punch. 




          
                                        Nico, yours truly, Cheffy, Tianna, Max and Erik at the beginning 
                                                 of the night. Times the paint on us by a trillion,
                                               that was the look we were sporting by midnight.

                                                           Photo cred: The Steel Fam Jam

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Divers Life For Me

07:32 nm 0 Comments

It's been a while since I've posted last, I've been super busy! Which is good right? People go on get aways to do new stuff. Don't feel shafted, I haven't even talked to my Mother... I'm sure she's super amped about that.

It's quite surprising but I have a routine here on San Pedro. Every morning it wake up around 6:30, I make breakfast and pick out what bikini I want to wear that day, I sit on the beach and read the material I am studying then around 8, I go to the shop for mermaid training.

My days at the shop are awesome. The guys there are amazing to me, they are very protective, and love to play jokes on me. The newest one is throwing my equipment in the water before I am ready. I end up throwing myself into the ocean with one fin and my wet suit half on. They tell me "Ojos Bonita, it's training" I just think they like to see me flail out the boat to catch it.

I usually dive twice a day. Yesterday I had 2 test dives, a navigation dive and a deep dive. The navigation dive was pretty great, and a nurse shark hung around to see how I did. Nurse sharks remind me of puppies. I've had a one follow me around the entire dive hoping I'd feed him some chum. Sorry puppy shark...  The deep dive was pretty rad though. Going deep is an addiction, I always find myself wanting more. I had to complete a few simple math questions at 105 feet, to make sure I could think clearly at depth. When you deep dive you take the chance of getting nitrogen narcosis. I felt it a little bit. There is a point where your body can't handle the amount of nitrogen in your body. As you go deeper, water becomes more dense, therefore your air becomes dense. You end up breathing more nitrogen. When you get narc'd ( nitrogen narcosis) you get a wobbly, drunk feeling. It's really easy to reverse, just slowly swim up a few feet and voliá, sobriety.  

After completeing math questions and proving I am just as smart as I am on land, my instructor took me through this amazing tunnel. It was covered in coral, and had pockets where patches of light would shine through making the dark tunnel aqua blue again. Sometimes I forget that I am deep into the ocean while I am diving. It's become such a normal part of my day. There was one day where I spend more time out on the ocean then on land. That makes me wonder what I am going to do when I get back to Vancouver. 

That thought has been provoked by the many people who pass through the dive shop who are on their 2 week vacations, when they find out I am here for 6. They always ask "What are you going to do when you get home?" My response was panicked for a while, trying to make up possible situations I could see myself doing when I get back to reality. I've come to the conclusion that I just don't know what I am going to do. Although I do know it will be great. I've lead myself to this path where I am being educated, and accomplishing something I've always wanted to do. I trust my instincts to create the right future for me. The only thing I want to worry about today is if I am going to have to dive after my equipment.

                                     


                                     
       

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Hot Child in San Pedro City

15:31 nm 0 Comments

Solo adventure time is finally here!! I just dropped Paul off at the airport, he was pretty sad to go, I had to keep reminding him that he owns a place on San Pedro, it won't be last time he comes here. Lucky Dude.

After Paul was gone, I had a moment of exhilaration, today is the day that it all starts fresh, again. I love  change, and trying something new and exciting in San Pedro, on my very own, is exactly what I was craving. 

I made my way down to Chuck and Robbie's, after I grabbed an orange juice from Rubys Cafe, a place I went to religiously 5 years ago for my Johnny Cake breakfast. I talked to Robbie about diving, where to get good groceries, and where I can attempt to go running in the morning. Then he showed me my new casa. Holy mama, I am in love. It's bright yellow walls make me smile from ear to ear, the cute little kitchenette is where I'll be making some new meals, and my bed is huge!! The best part is that it had ocean front views. Hecckkkk ya! 

Remember how I said that I believe in omens? I've had a few appear since I've been here that have made my nervousness disappear, but this one caught me by surprise. I was fiddling with my new apartment keys in my hand ( I am always fidgeting, sitting still is not an option), when I looked down at them, I saw  the name "Simon". This made me smile. Simon is a good friend of mine that moved back to New Zealand last year, he taught me about seeking adventure, and I feel that this part of my trip will be th most adventurous part. Now you might be thinking "Girl, you just pickin' things to be excited about, quit it". It's okay, I kinda think that way myself, but when an omen sneaks up on my like this, my heart stops and I can't help but get so, so excited.

It's time to fill my fridge, and empty my backpack, before I know it I will be 60 feet deep in ocean blue.


       


                                     

                                     




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Back to Reality... Kinda.

07:44 nm 0 Comments

Today is the last day of easy livin' on Saphire Beach. I've spent 9 days sitting in the sun, reading Harry Potter, and living a resort relaxation lifestyle (hellllooo rum punch). Tomorrow Paul leaves to go back to snowy Calgary and I'm on my own. Although I'll miss Paul, I'm excited to start the next mermaid chapter of my adventure.

I was on the hunt for a perfect dive shop, and cheap accomodation. I asked some of the locals where their favorite places to dive were and I kept hearing "Chuck and Robbie's". Meeting Robbie was the most important thing for me, seeing as he would be teaching me. I wanted to be able to trust him. I'm one of those people who know if I like someone within the first 10 minutes of meeting them. I get vibes that tell me if someone is trouble, twisted or genuine. From what my spidie senses tell me, Robbie is real, he's honest, and a hard worker. I think he's going to push me, which is awesome cause I think I could use a kick in the lady bits to get myself more motivated. So I'm pleased to say that I'll be diving at "Chuck and Robbie's" for the next month.

As for accomodation, Robbie was the man (again) and set me up with a place to live. I contemplated a beach fort, seeing as I have hidden talents in the art of fort making, then I thought of all the sand in my bed and quickly changed my mind. Right across from the dive shop I am going to be renting a little yellow apartment. It has beach front views and a king sized bed for star-fishing. It's all coming together perfectly, I'm stoked to make some friends, memories and complete a goal I've been wanting to achive! 

                                     
   

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Momma-ME's Prawn Dish

18:38 nm 0 Comments

I'm going to aplogize to my mom in advance before she reads any more of ths-Sorry mom, you know it's true.

My mom wasn't the best cook when I was younger, it was a weekly endeavour with her in the kitchen. She often burned ladles, and bread bags to the element on the stove. This resulted in my hiding in my bedroom, hoping that dinner time never came because whatever was cooking "smelt like burnt celery". Over the years I've seen my mom grow in the kitchen. With her interest in items that are organicly grown and trying new whole food recipes she's become quite inventive. 

Momma-ME's (MaryEllen) Prawn Dish was made famous with my step dad when my parents met. Paul, claiming that he loved hot food was not prepared for moms sneaky attempted to make him sweat, and did it. Every time my mom makes this dish, Paul tells me the story of how he was slugging back beers and trying not to let mom see his misty brow. 

I love making this for people. It's definitely not a waist trimmer, and it tastes a little different every time, but it always reminds me of home. Seeing as I am living ocean side, I thought it was an appropriate to channel my inner Momma-ME and make something close to home for Paul.

Momma-ME's Prawn Dish

1/2lb of cooked peeled jumbo prawns
1 1/2c of wild rice 
1/4lb of unsalted butter (...I told you it won't trim waists)
1/4tsp red chili flakes
1tbsp of your favourite hot sauce (Sriacha anyone??)
1/2tbs of Cajun spice mix
1/2 bottle of beer ( I used the Belize local beer, Belikin baabbbyy)

1. Make yo wild ass rice. I just followed the instructions on the box.

2. With 10 minutes left on the cook time for the rice, put the butter, chili flakes and Cajun spices in a large frying pan and let bubble in the fatty goodness for about 3-5 minutes. Momma-ME says this makes all the spices tango into an inferno, and that's exactly what you want.

3. Add your bubba-gump prawns into the inferno, let simmer for 2 minutes. Add the hot sauce and half your beer, then drink the rest of the beer.

4. If you are feeling sassy, add more spices, the heat is up to you baby! Let the mixture simmer for a minute, then add the rice to the sauce pan. 

Now serve up some hell!


                                                  

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Numbers and Beers

11:53 nm 0 Comments

I've finally arrived, a month of patiently waiting and working hard has payed off! After all the flights, I turned on my phone in the Belize airport, greeting me was the time 1:11. For the people who know me well, they know that seeing triple matching digits is not uncommon for me. It started last summer, and hasn't stopped. At first I freaked out claiming that "numbers were following my unlucky ass" but now I take comfort in them, and view them as a good omen.

With the stamp of approval from my numbers, I knew I was in the right place. Yesterday my step dad met me at the San Pedro airport, there we started our hunt for a perfect spot of a Belikin Beer. It's awesome to see him, and it was awesome to see him have a couple too many tequilas last night too. 

Today is a day to unwind, lay in hammocks and bake in the sunshine. I've started reading "The Alchemist", it's probably the best book to read before starting out on an adventure. I'm laying the the hammock reading Paulo Coelho in complete awe, saying  "Are you for real Paulo?" In my ghetto fabulous voice out loud at the parts that make my heart stop.

I'm staying in the North of San Pedro at my parents newly built apartment.  The front door opens right up to the beach, and I can see the break of the second largest barrier reef.  I can hear the water crash up on to the shore when I am falling asleep, a lot more relaxing then the commuters racing down 49th in Vancouver. 
The sun is shining, and I have a nasty hankering for some rum and coconuts. 

                                         


         
                                         





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To adventure!

16:41 nm 0 Comments

I have to admit, I've been avoiding starting a blog for a long time now. It has always been something I was interested in, mainly because I always have so much to say and not very many people to tell it too. 
Today seems like the most perfect day to start "Way it Goes" because I am about to take the plunge on an amazing journey. I'll tell you more about that later. 

Originally I planned for "Way it Goes" to have this super methodical title. Once I punched it into the data base- I found out someone was already methodical before me. Naturally, I shrugged my shoulders and said aloud to myself "Fuck it, way it goes". 

This blog is going to be about my life, which I am trying to jam pack full of adventure, love, fashion,  food and cats. "Way it Goes" is also a place for my friends and family to touch base with my travels. Thanks to my gypsy mother, I was born with the travel bug. I have had so many wonderful opportunities to visit places I'd never dreamt of going, and will continue to visit more. 

Today I am setting myself up for adventure, and going to Belize for 6 weeks. I've been there before when I was 17, and always wanted to go back.  I've recently decided I needed a life change. In the last month, I decided it was time to resign from my day job with a company I've been working with for 2 and a half years and take some time to find out who I really am and what I wanted from 2014. What better way to do it on beaches and in the deep blue.  

Visit "Way it Goes" to see what I've been up too, or to read the rambillings of my mind that I decided to share, there will be beautiful photos (many of cats) and stories of adventure, people who touch my heart and silly situations I always seems to get myself into. 

See ya later cold ass Canada! 


                                      



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